UNITED 93: High-jacking Hypocrisy
posted in `Roids |(Or “If We Don’t See This Movie, Then the Terrorists Have Won!â€)
Q: How does Hollywood respond to the inspiring battle cry of the doomed Flight 93 passenger, Todd Beemer, “Let’s Roll�
A: By yelling, “Let’s roll… CAMERAS… And quickly shit out a trivial recreation of one of the most tragic days in American history faster than it takes Beemer’s blood to dry!â€
I was born and raised in NYC. I have lived through it all. The Son of Sam, Lennon’s assassination, the 1979 Blackout, and the Yankees 2004 choke to the fucking Red Sox. I feel it’s a badge of honor to live through the tragedies of the greatest city on Earth…
So imagine my horror on September 11th, 2001 when I found myself in jolly old England as the Two Towers came crashing down.
Here I was, witnessing an NYC/American tragedy on video, the most dreaded of medium for a 35mm filmmaker [And, as my D.P. of the past few years Brendan Rodham Flynt says, “Digital tape sucks!â€].
When I came back to NYC, everyone would trade war stories about where they were, what they saw, and who they knew that fell with the towers that fateful day. All I could say was, “I watched it on TV.†It was like the day I was in a drug induced coma when President Kennedy was shot. How was I to be part of the tribe of fuckers who, although they had no connection to the victims of 9/11, were in the same city on that day and therefore could proudly tell their pain-by-association stories?Thanks to the Hollywood dream weavers, my prayers have been answered! Through NBC Universal (…OOPS I forgot… and the “I feel your pain†Director of “UNITED 93†Paul Green-Crass.. I mean Greengrass, who is not from Hollywood – because he’s not even American…), we get to vividly relive one of the most tragic days in American history in not 1, but 2 films, mind you (“UNITED 93,†“WORLD TRADE CENTERâ€). It took 60 years for Michael Bay to film “PEARL HARBOR,†it took 40 years after JFK was shot for “JFK†to get shot, and now just five fucking years for 9/11 to be exploited. This is a self serving film which does nothing to serve the national interest or the world of Art.
Even the charitable side of “UNITED 93†is disgusting. Universal is giving 10% of the opening week’s gross receipts to the dead peoples’ fund. Rather than donate a flat sum like 5 million dollars, which is nothing by Hollywood standards, NBC Universal’s donation is tied to box office receipts. So, the unfortunate relatives of the more unfortunate dead better get out there and drum up some ticket sales! Talk about cynicism!Universal Pictures (they are owned by G.E. who makes jet engines… perverse product placement perhaps?) hopes to make lots of money from “UNITED 93.â€
America itself, the generation that lived through 9/11 but didn’t actually live through 9/11, now gets to experience all the confusion, terror, fire, and death in an air-conditioned mega-plex. And not only do we get to see the tragedy in glorious 1.85:1 digital projection, we get MUSICAL CUES to tell us when to cry… a booming sound design to tell us that these box cutters are sharp… AND THESE MOTHER FUCKING ASSFUCKS SAY I EXPLOIT!?Maybe I should take a page from the NBC Universal playbook:
10 percent of the first week box office of POULTRYGEIST, once it is theatrically released in the fall of 2006, will go to Chicken Native American Zombie Charities. It is your duty as a concerned American to buy your tickets NOW! If you don’t see POULTRYGEIST in its first week, you are less then a human being.